We’ve all seen ‘Pen Pineapple Apple Pen’ by now, yeah?
This song’s been permanently on the lips of every Japanese schoolkid for weeks. I heard it on repeat in the changing rooms at the pool, in the park, on the bus, at karaoke… My summer’s been fun, suffice to say. I’ve even had the occasional adult greet me with “I have a pen?” instead of “How are you?”
All fads have their 15 minutes, and in Japan they time them down to the second. Once Pikotaro started doing the rounds on primetime TV, I thought this trend was on its way out.
And then this happened.
Not Sesame Street! Right in the childhood.
My main objection is that this video gave me a craving for butter cookies and I don’t have any. There, I said it.
And… is it just me, or is Cookie Monster clashing with his own shirt? Electric blue with leopard print isn’t an obvious sartorial choice.
There’s also the, um, not insignificant issue of trying to use ‘choco’ and ‘butter’ as nouns. You know me, you know that’s going to nark me right off.
Sesame Street is meant to be educational. And because that education is wrapped up in furry muppet puppet fun, you remember what you learn. I still hum this song when counting things:
And future sensible adults will hum it, too, because Sesame Street is still using that melody:
But I digress.
If I hear a kid singing “I have a butter” in real life, I might scream. Let’s hope, for that poor unsuspecting child’s sake, that there isn’t a decently-sized pineapple within my reach.
The issue with ‘butter’ is that you should use ‘the’ and not ‘a’ before it, but ‘choco’ isn’t even a word! “I have a choco” is not good English, plain and simple. “I have a Chocobo” works if you’re playing a Final Fantasy game, but that’s about all you can get away with.
As far as I’m concerned, ‘C’ will always be for ‘Cookie’. Not ‘Cookie-Choco-Butter-Cookie’. Sorry, unusually magenta Japanese version of Elmo wearing a 70s curtain.
