How to Spot a Comedy Creep

The #MeToo movement was a defining moment for women in the entertainment industry. For the first time ever, women felt like they could share their stories and be believed. But after the hashtag stopped trending and the news cycle moved on, many of these men just laid low for a while before continuing their careers. They still got booked, they still went on tour to sold-out arenas, even after people knew how they treated women. 

It’s usually pros like Louis CK who make the headlines,  but women get sexually harassed at every level of comedy. Even though comedy is getting more inclusive, there’s still a long way to go for women. For new female comics navigating the scene, it can be hard to know what’s appropriate and what’s not.

It’s an industry that by its very nature has blurred professional boundaries – it’s an industry where your appearance matters, your workplace is generally a bar, your colleagues are often drunk and you usually see them late at night. And to top it all off, there’s no HR department to report creeps to. 

As a female comic who’s gigged in multiple cities and countries, I’ve encountered my share of Comedy Creeps. And the thing about Creeps is they tend to have very similar playbooks. I’ve put together a few tips on how to tell the difference between Comedy Creep and a legit promoter in the hopes that other women won’t have to go through some of the stuff that I did: 

You’re not sure how they got your details

There’s nothing unusual about chatting to other comics at a gig and getting a friend request from them the next day. It’s also normal for someone who’s an admin or moderator of a comedy Facebook group to add you so they can add you into a private group, or a group chat. 

But a Comedy Creep will add you out of the blue, without necessarily ever having spoken to you. They’ll also be evasive when you ask how they found your details or where you know them from, most likely because they know their answers give them away as being Creeps. Their messages might seem professional on the surface, but they’ll have flirty undertones and possibly a few emojis thrown in. They’ll also probably go through your profile and like a bunch of your posts – if the majority of the posts are selfies that have nothing to do with comedy, that’s a huge red flag.

They ask you personal questions

They might start off talking about comedy, but they’ll find a way to steer the subject towards subjects like sex, relationships or your plans for the week. This isn’t to say that every comedian who brings up Tinder in a conversation is hitting on you, but when they jump into subjects like this in their first few messages that’s probably a sign their intentions are not completely professional.

They string you along when you ask for spots

Different promoters will have different preferences about how they want people to contact them about spots. If you’re a new comedian, a good place to start looking is on social media. Every city will generally have at least one comedy Facebook group where new comics can get advice and promoters can post when they need spots filled. You can generally just reply to the post, or message them privately. Sometimes they’ll have an online form to fill out indicating what dates you’re available. 

A Comedy Creep may still do these things, but if you’re a woman they want to sleep with you’ll have to jump through extra hoops. They might say things  like ‘Why don’t you come down and check out my night and we can talk about a spot then?’ or ‘Let’s talk more about comedy over food/drinks sometime.’ If you’re new to the scene, it can seem really flattering when an established comedian takes an interest in your career and is willing to give you that time. But legit promoters don’t expect you to schmooze for spots – you ask them and they’ll give you a straight answer.

They pass themselves off as mentors

Part of what makes it so tricky to tell the difference between a Comedy Creep and someone who genuinely wants to help you is that Creeps won’t always be upfront about their intentions. They’ll be very keen to impress you with their knowledge of the local scene, but they’ll only give you tidbits of information, promising they’ll tell you more if you meet up with them one-on-one. Comedians are generally pretty happy to share what they know if you ask them, without making it conditional on you meeting them face-to-face.

They ignore you when you’re with other men

It’s not unusual for comics to bring partners or dates along to gigs. It’s also completely normal for a promoter to be busy running around on the night and not really have much of an opportunity to chat to acts or guests. But if they go from going out of their way to find excuses to talk to you when you’re on your own to basically ignoring you when there’s another guy around, that’s probably a good sign he’s a creep. 

Your gut tells you something is off

You know how sometimes you get a weird feeling about someone and you can’t put your finger on why? When it comes to men in comedy, always, ALWAYS pay attention to that feeling.

Comedy Creeps are smart. They know if they hit on you too blatantly you’ll just straight-up reject them, and possibly tell other women to stay away from them. They might build up your trust over time so you feel comfortable opening up to them about your life, sticking around for post-gig drinks, or accepting offers of lifts or walks home. And once they’ve got you in a vulnerable position, they’ll show their true colours. 

It can be tough setting boundaries when you’re worried about missing out on opportunities. But if you’re working hard at your craft and getting stage time, you will be noticed and offered spots. You don’t have to justify your boundaries to anyone!