What news events caught the eye of The Tomboy Tirade crew? Hosts of Asia’s biggest and only all-female comedy chat podcast, Persis and Raven from the Tomboy Tarts give their ten prickly picks for the month of November.
PRICKLY PICK #1 – Kim Kardashian is weighing up million dollar deals to talk about Paris robbery
Kim Kardashian has laid low for a month and that is a few lifetimes by Keeping Up with the Kardashians standard. Still, a million dollar cheque beckons from the NBC which is vying to get Kim tell her side of the story. Even a millionaire like her has to admit that amount would come in handy. Hiring a new crack security team is not going to be cheap, especially if you want Jason Bourne to whisk you to safety or Bryan Mills to threaten potential robbers over the phone.
PRICKLY PICK #2 – MICROSOFT wows the tech crowd – who would have thought?
Apple has set the global tech world on fire with its impressive new Surface Studio range that goes back to its innovative roots…. Wait, is Microsoft the new Apple now? It looks like the once frumpy rival has gone through a 180 degree makeover and embraced a whole new metrosexual lifestyle – working out in the gym, giving up Cheetos and pizza for protein shakes and salads, and trading in dowdy suits and 90s hairdo for bespoke ones and smart shaves. Meanwhile, the only shiny toy we get from Apple is an emoji touch pad.
PRICKLY PICK #3 – Dr Strange meets Dr House
Dr Strange is a Marvel superhero parody about BBC’s Sherlock playing an American doctor not unlike Dr. House, who was basically an American Sherlock Holmes in a hospital. Remember that time when Dr House travel to Nepal to find a cure for his leg pain and learn mystic arts from a mysterious Asian fight club? Nope, it’s not lupus.
PRICKLY PICK #4 – Male birth control pill scrapped because men can’t handle the side effects
It comes as no surprise that we all collectively rejoiced when we heard that a male contraceptive pill is in the works. Men taking the pill instead of us? YES!!!
This can’t be right, a male birth control pill sounds too good to be true! As it turns out, the medical trials have now been scrapped. Apparently, 20 men in the trial suffered side effects such as acne, libido changes, muscle pain and even depression. So the pill is a no go despite the 96% successful rate, dashing our collective hopes in one fell swoop.
Wait, you say, are these not the SAME side-effects that women on the pill are dealing with? And 20 men not putting up with them is enough to get the entire trial stopped indefinitely!? Imagine if the female birth control pill was canned because of the side effects. Pretty sure there’d be more than 20 or even 200 of us complaining!
PRICKLY PICK #5 – People are freaked out over new clown emoji
The peach is no longer a butt as the humourless drones at Apple have gotten rid of the original booty-like emoji for the first beta version of its iOS 10.2 software.
But there is one that has slipped through the cracks (pun intended) and is now causing a commotion in the midst of the 2016 clown-pocolypse. Yes, the clown emoji is here and there’s nothing you can do about it. Sure there are plenty of legitimate reasons to use a clown emoji, like when you are running off to join the circus. But really, you’re just going use it to scare your clown-fearing friends. Sorry, to all my coulrophobic peers out there.
PRICKLY PICK #6 – Hilary Duff and Jason Walsh Apologize Following Backlash Over Controversial Halloween Costumes
So there is a lot going on here. We all thought Hilary Duff was the good one but it turns out she’s just as clueless as they come. On any day a Native American costume is already problematic enough. And to pair a Native American with a pilgrim who got the ball rolling on the whole genocide thing, plus there’s all the times they set old women on fire.
PRICKLY PICK #7 – Bill Cosby: Blind leading the blind…
It’s getting harder and harder to find Bill Cosby innocent of any wrongdoing these days. Heck, Cosby is so guilty, he would set off alarm bells at any retail store or parking lot with him just casually strolling in it.
This time around, Cosby comes up with another genius excuse to avoid sexual assault charges being thrown at him willy nilly. He is officially blind. According to NBC news, Cosby has already prepared paperwork for the judge that proves he is “legally blind,” making it physically impossible for him to identify any of the accusers he allegedly drugged and raped. Wow! Some nerve!
That probably also explains the horrific jumper choices on his hit show The Cosby Show back in the 80s, which were equally sacrilegious.
PRICKLY PICK #8 – Is anyone going to be US Prezzie this election?
Just days before the 2016 Presidential election, Hillary Clinton is in full panic mode as the FBI splits open her email and private server scandal that was dismissed four months ago. On the other side of bad presidential candidates continent, Trump is denying sexual allegation charges from accusers who are slowly coming out of the woodwork.
At this rate, there is only one clear choice for President. Vote for Trump’s blond wig. It’s the only thing that has looked and stayed consistent all these years.
PRICKLY PICK #9 – The bigger, better, less explosive Apple Watch Series 2…
The new Apple Watch Series 2 is thinner, longer lasting and promises fans everything the first collection never was.
The makers are boasting that it’s really a waterproof watch, is brighter, faster and even has a built-in GPS. The only thing critics are unhappy about is that it doesn’t have a Samsung Note 7 explosive detector. Damn!
PRICKLY PICK #10 – Beauty Trends of the Future…
Computerised makeup, 3D lipstick and DNA beauty injections. These are just some of the beauty trends we can expect our favourites cosmetics brands to be pushing out in the near future.
While most sound crazy ‘cray-cray’, one thing’s for sure – we’re all heading towards becoming beauty droids as predicted in George Orwell’s famous novel, ‘1984’.
Check if there’s a flap under the back of your neck with a hidden barcode will ya?
