Everybody knows that for every actress there comes a day when she is no longer ‘fuckable’. The media decides and it usually means she spends the rest of her days playing the role of mother – or grandmother – to an actor who once played her love interest.
Comedian and actress Amy Schumer (still fuckable) happened upon Tina Fey, Patricia Arquette and Julia Louis-Dreyfus celebrating Julia’s official ‘last fuckable day’ in a woodland glade.
The women, who appear to know how to celebrate, shared their unfuckable wisdom with Amy. You know you have finally reached unfuckability when, for instance. “you go to a movie set, you go to your wardrobe and the only thing they have for you to wear are long sweaters” or when you notice the titles of your films changing to “very uplifting and yet vague titles like ‘Whatever It Takes’ or ‘She Means Well.'”
However, do not weep for Julia on her LFD, she for one is grateful she managed to stick out being fuckable all through her forties and some of her fifties. “I thought that US Weekly had made some sort of clerical error or something.”
And the actresses do not recommend trying to delay your LFD. Why would you if it means you get to have celebrations like this one and enjoy being funny women? The party ends with a Viking-like ceremony and a cigar.
Amy Schumer explained the sketch, which launched her new series Inside Amy Schumer has been a long time coming: “This scene we’ve been trying to make for three years, and lots of actresses said no.” Which is a great example of how much actresses fear becoming ‘unfuckable’ worse than being, say, untalented. What’s frightening is they are right. But maybe this is the beginning of us all being able to laugh ageing off.
Still, it was worth the wait, with a fantastic cast that should assuage anyone’s fears of reaching their LFD, if not dismiss the whole notion of such a thing all together.
You can watch it here.
