You’ve eaten too much, you’ve exhausted the sales, and you are spending your evenings dancing around the leftover Quality Street. So what now? Unfurl the Pringles tube and lick the salty residue OR decide to better yourself?
I’ve made resolutions since I could pronounce the word, but I can count on one finger how many I’ve kept. So this year I’ve made a more realistic list which, though less ambitious than ‘run a marathon’ or ‘find and climb a mountain’, is probably more achievable:
Improve my crisp: real food ratio
When I’m not eating crisps, I am thinking about eating crisps. And when they run out, I feel panicky until the grocery delivery man brings my next fix. For shame.
So resolution number one is to eat fewer crisps and more normal, grown up food like asparagus, hummus and ‘zucchini’. Or at least to branch out into a different snack category – I hear peanuts are nice.
Stop hating strangers
I cannot sit on the tube, stand in a queue or walk down the street without developing an intense dislike for perfect strangers. One hint of rising intonation – I just bought some jeggings? – noisy eating, loud chewing, or ear exploration and my hackles are up.
So I resolve to stop this and be nicer, or otherwise spend more time with my eyes closed and my hands over my ears.
Organise a wedding without becoming a psychopath
Despite everything shared in resolution numbers one and two somebody wants to marry me. And we’ve got nine months until we’re tied in. FOREVER.
I know this isn’t technically a resolution as I can’t aim to do this better than I have previously, nor can it come up again next year as an area for improvement (unless it goes really well in which case I might want to get married again) but nevertheless, it is my aim to organise a very nice wedding which everybody will enjoy but not to become the wedding. I still want to be able to go out without shouting ‘VOL-AU-VENTS!’ when asked how I am.
DO SOME EXERCISE!
Last year I made a resolution to get fit. I had got to 26 without really doing any exercise – unless you count chatting or running through Marks and Spencer when the Final Reductions sales rack is brought out.
And I made a good start – Zumba once a week, more walking, less tubing. But then I got lazy, started making excuses – ‘But it’s raining!’ – and now I haven’t been for months. This is not a resolution to become the next Jessica Ennis (I’m sure she’ll be delighted to hear,) but just not the next Waynetta Slob. And as those wise Wombles said: ‘exercise is good for you, laziness is not.'
So there you have it
That’s my list and you can hold me to it. (We will – updates throughout the year! Ed.) But where to start? I’m so tired from Christmas I don’t know how to begin.
Perhaps a little snack will help me on my way…
Charlotte Reeve lives in London, spends too much time on Twitter, and blogs about all things lady related – boys, weddings, being too cold… etc. She likes staying in, sitting down, and watching Coronation Street – and occasionally going out dancing, as long as nobody touches her. You can read more of Charlotte’s thoughts on her blog Nothing Good Rhymes With Charlotte
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